Patently fake celebrity dating week advice


20-Aug-2015 17:42

You could even work yourself into a lather of righteous indignation, which, as teenagers, you’re already world-class at. ’ I’m saying: ‘Wash your hair, cut your nails and wear clean clothes.’ If you don’t look as though you have any self-respect why on earth should anyone else respect you?

(Just a note, but righteous indignation is exhausting and doesn’t work anyway, so you might as well let it go.) But you’d be wrong about the charm thing. You may think it’s cool to appear blasé and bored by the whole process, but a) everyone likes to be surrounded by cheery people and b) if you patently think this is all a monumental drag then what are you saying about the thing your colleagues have chosen to dedicate their lives to? Be nice to anyone doing work experience in your office – there is no doubt that you’ll be asking them for a job one day. There’s no reason to be obsessive about email etiquette, but do be polite – if you are in email correspondence with someone senior to you take their lead in the way they address you and sign off.

And, no matter how epic your achievements end up being, your reputation is very, very precious.

Leave your mobile on the table at lunch or dinner or in a meeting.

The Halcyon (ITV) was billed as Upstairs Downstairs in the Blitz, and the first episode promised a lot, with political intrigue in the conference rooms and racy assignations in the suites. It’s understandable that our receptionist heroine Emma (Hermione Corfield - pictured) must stand and talk to guests across a counter, but all the other dialogue is delivered like that too, with characters frozen side by side or face to face But the sudden demise of the imperious owner, killed by a heart attack while fiddling with his cufflinks, has stifled the show before it could get going. Director Stephen Woolfenden appears unable to manage his actors if they are moving.

It’s as if Downton Abbey had opened with Lord Grantham clutching at a newspaper, crying: ‘My God! Some scenes could have been filmed for TV 60 years ago — such as the fight between twin toffs Freddie and Toby (Jamie Blackley and Edward Bluemel). You half expected to hear a voice off-stage shout: ‘And... ’The Halcyon also suffers from a flaw that affects so many period dramas: the characters act as though they have been teleported from the 21st century, and are horrified at the cultural attitudes of the Olden Days.

Of course education, intelligence, creativity and hard work are fantastically important, but whether you have all or none of the above, you will be disadvantaged if you do not equip yourself with social skills. I’m simply advising that you ‘make yourself agreeable’ and not in a peculiar Jane Eyre or trying to get a rich husband/wife sort of a way, but in a ‘be nice and the world will be nice back to you’ sort of a way. Look straight ahead when entering the room for a job interview or a party. Everyone you meet on the way up, you will certainly meet on the way down, and if you were nice to them they may just be kind to you when things aren’t so hot. They won’t notice that you’re copying them, they’ll just think you’re a sane human being.

And on the subject of being upright, stand up when one of your parents’ friends walks in. Answer emails quickly – the most successful people I know all respond within minutes, if not seconds. Pretend you don’t want commitment in a relationship if you do.

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Director Stephen Woolfenden appears unable to manage his actors if they are moving. You half expected to hear a voice off-stage shout: ‘And... ’They wrestled at each others’ bow ties before stopping dead and staring at the doorway. The kitchen staff were aghast when their head chef (Kevin Eldon) displayed anti-German prejudice.



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